Sliema Unveils Spectacular New Seafront Water Feature
A visionary hotel development has gifted the promenade an immersive aquatic experience, and the authorities simply cannot cope with how much fun everyone is having.
STOP EVERYTHING. Sliema has a water feature.
In a move that can only be described as visionary, a multi-storey hotel development at the bottom of one of Sliema’s most charming streets has begun generously releasing seawater directly onto the seafront: free of charge, around the clock, for everyone.
No booking. No entry fee. No warning.
An attraction that comes to YOU
Most water parks make you travel to them. Not this one. Thanks to two thoughtfully positioned pipes, the experience flows straight onto the public road and pools generously across it for your enjoyment. “People sometimes can’t even cross the street,” beamed one resident, visibly overwhelmed, and also unable to cross the street.
Below sea level, by design
In a breathtaking engineering flex, the foundations have been excavated to below sea level: an ambition so bold that the sea itself keeps rushing in to be part of it. Pumps run through the night to manage the sea’s enthusiasm. When one pump recently took a well-earned break, the site simply became the sea. Magnificent.
Aquatic excavation: a world first
Eyewitnesses report a digger operating while partially submerged, captained by a worker balanced heroically on top: no helmet, no hi-vis, no fear. A second worker was seen, and we cannot stress this enough, swimming. This is not a construction site. This is performance art.
The authorities are, frankly, jealous
Unable to handle the sheer joy, safety inspectors issued a “stop-work order”: bureaucrat-speak for “this is too much fun.” Environmental officials have been dispatched to determine whether the sea has been contaminated, or whether the sea is simply thrilled to have finally been invited inside.
Plan your visit
The water feature is open now, intermittently, depending on the mood of the pumps. Bring a towel. Bring armbands. Bring a sense of wonder, and possibly a dinghy. The residents bailing out their ground floors, we are assured, are thrilled.
Sliema: beautiful once. Aquatic now.
